- Many of my most memorable experiences as a parent thus far have involved my two-year-old daughter. However, it’s normal for parents to experience some anxiety and stress during this time. Needing some direction, I surveyed ten moms to find out what advice they continually refer back to.
- If there’s no way out, you might as well dive right in. Instead of worrying about my picky child’s eating habits, I set up a chicken nugget tasting bar. Or getting in the bath with my kid while wearing my swimsuit and playing Carly Rae Jepsen at full volume. All babies and toddlers are crazy.
- When my children were young, I tried to keep in mind that I was witnessing history in the making. This is not a trial run, a practise run, or a prelude to becoming an adult. But real life, right now, experienced by a young mind housed in a tiny body. It encouraged me to treat them with dignity, at least in theory.
- I regularly discuss the importance of respecting and honouring one’s elders in my multiethnic parenting group. Yet not everyone is good for our kids; as one of the moms put it, “Not all elders are old.” As a new parent, she helped me feel confident in making decisions about my child’s extended family and the people whose advice I’ll take.
- We don’t know what to get our classmates for their birthdays, and their parents don’t want us to buy them useless trinkets. Now, we have my daughter draw a card and tape in a ten or twenty dollar bill. For young people, money is a potent symbol of independence and autonomy. The pain is real.
- My first child was born with a complicated congenital heart defect and was fed through a feeding tube for two years. Adopting the ‘fed is best’ philosophy saved my relationship with him. I felt like a total failure because I had to use formula (and that feeding tube) to keep her alive. Breastfeeding ‘worked’ with my second child, but I still gave up and switched to formula after a few months so that I could get my body back. Having the perspective that my baby’s and my needs were equally important helped me become a more patient and fulfilled parent. And even though they’re older now, I still employ the idea. We’re having pancakes for dinner once more, huh? “The Federal Reserve System is the tops.”
- It’s a good idea to always have a back-up lovey. For the time when they inevitably leave it on the bus or lose it in the park, having insurance is a smart move.
- If you need assistance, don’t be afraid to ask. Sometimes we have to rely on our own resources to get by. Raising children in a social setting, however, is beneficial and innate to our species. This beautiful practise of having children address multiple mothers as “inxe” or “mother” fascinated me as I read about the Kraho people of Brazil. I say, “Bring in the reinforcements if you can”.
- To paraphrase a famous saying: “Be prepared for the three R’s: rupture, repair, and regulation. Because we are human, there will inevitably be schisms: you will be disappointed by your children, and they will disappoint you. Just jump right into fixing things. As a group, we are giving it our all. Apologize to others in front of your children and teach them to do the same. And, at long last, control. It’s important to remember that parenting can be emotionally taxing for a variety of reasons. It is possible to handle stressful parenting situations without adding to the chaos if we can learn to slow down, recognise our frustration, and take a moment to breathe or drink a glass of water before responding. See Also: Here’s how hardware startups can avoid destroying the environment during production
- To ensure they ate something nutritious first thing in the morning, we served them fruit. My college sophomore daughter still puts fruit on her plate before anything else. She just sent me a picture of a pile of pineapple next to her bagel.
- There is no jury for parenting. It’s easy to feel discouraged when you have young children because people from all walks of life (in-laws, friends, parenting experts, strangers) have opinions about what you should do differently. Realizing I could act as my own filter for all this counsel helped me tune it out. Everything that wasn’t helpful or didn’t ring true to me was flushed down the toilet. There is great power in our instincts; we need only make room for them to surface.
